caring

The delusion of caring that passes for caring among humans, like most human delusions, repulses me.

If this is too real for you, fuck off.

all the lonely people, where do they all come from?

really, who gives a fuck?

people are cruel

fear makes people cruel... even though it hurts them inside, they become numb to it and justify it by believing they must be cruel to survive... they must kill... they must hate... getting paid to be cruel is the norm... step on each other in the climb to the top... win at all costs... kindness is weakness... caring is weakness... the best liar wins... trust is weakness... be kind, caring, truthful, vulnerable, try it, you'll end up with nothing... show me proof otherwise if you can...

wasting time?

writing is a way of life for me and yet, why do i bother writing to people who do not respond, or worse, to people who do not even care to notice i am writing?... people suck sometimes, especially those who say they care and show interest for a little while and then prove they never actually did care by disappearing and worse, ignoring any attempts to stay connected in any way... it's worse when someone tells you (and shows you) they love you and want you to be their whole world... love is a waste on humans, they have no concept of how to do it or what it truly can be... why believe people can mean what they say?... why believe people can be trusted?... why believe people care when they so obviously do not?... fuck 'em all...

yeah, today

I remember, but what is the point, really, if nobody cares (interacts to accept the caring, cha)?...

or perhaps the point is

the music above this or the words down below or the story in your eyes (go to the mirror boy?)... just listen and read and you'll find it if you want to and then it will matter... we cannot do everything at once, we cannot be everything to everyone, and we can only focus on one moment at a time if we truly want to make the most of the moment, enjoy it well, and share it completely... any less, and we waste it... so be in your moments, experience your choices, and regret only that you have the awareness of other desires you must pass on... there can be only one number one...

cut the crap

We all hide here in this online purgatory, too scared to leave the thread of hope we might mean something to someone in this world, too scared to go out and face the high potential for rejection or worse, too scared to face the truth of this illusionary celebrity and imaginary friendship we build in our minds.

Life is out there, where are we?